I've tried many ways to recover before I realized that a condition that had hampered my life since its very beginning was called a disease. I became interested in the subject - causes, treatment and so on as I studied about diseases in many ways, reaching for both conventional and alternative medicinal approaches. I wanted to heal from my disease and feel good. It seemed almost impossible to know more (not literally, of course, this is a figurative expression for the amount of information that I have acquired in this topic). The problem was, that I couldn't apply this knowledge. I circled around the subject like a fly around horse dung, but I still didn't understand what it was all about.
I also felt with the sixth sense, that it was not my way. 'It' meaning , steroids and surgery on one hand and on the other - special diets, yoga, breathing techniques, affirmations, visualizations, positive thinking and other acts of conscious action aimed at recovery. It is not that they are bad but just incompatible with my nature. Although - what exactly my nature was - I did not know myself, either. I did try out many of these techniques but none of them I felt, worked for me.
I read tons of books about healing and implementing changes in life, and although the advice I found sounded beautiful, I couldn't apply any of them. I was mesmerized by very attractively sounding slogans like: Love yourself !, Be good to yourself !, Start taking care of yourself !, Put yourself first! But there was a voice of reason in my head asking: Ok, fine, but how? How? How? What does that mean exactly ?! So, what exactly should I do? !!! What first step should I take?
I couldn't find the answer anywhere. So I kept wandering about ...