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From time immemorial, it symbolized unwavering optimism and unconditional love. Just looking at its sunny yellow petals makes you feel better. A robust and towering stalk is associated with confidence, stability, and calmness. It is beautiful in its simplicity and so consistent in following the sunlight. It calls for taking advantage of its 'life philosophy'.
What a contrast to our human struggles ...
We - are stuck in relationships that drain our energy for years, trying to change cold and insensitive partners into kind, loving, warm and cordial, interested in us and our lives, looking for our company together and we are trying to be 'deserving' of their love.
We - struggling to make ends meet in our hated jobs as we have to provide for the family, pay the mortgage, etc., waiting for the weekend as for salvation, and thinking of Monday as of the worst enemy.
We - are unable to answer the simple question: 'What do you like doing?' as it was so long ago that we have forgotten or have never done anything like that.
We - unable to quit smoking, drinking, overeating, buying unnecessary stuff, spending excessive time on the internet, cheating on a partner, losing money on gambling or engaging in anything that helps us somewhat suppress stress, anger, sadness or just overall depression, alleviating a sense of hopelessness and injustice of our fate.
We - jealously looking at all those who 'were lucky' and are in happy relationships, have time and money, health and beauty, and generally all we don't have but would like to have.
We - being too polite to those who are not polite or nice to us at all.
We - allowing important people to leave us because we do not want to admit mistakes we have made, being afraid that when we do that, the other party will treat us with contempt and anger, accuse unjustly or humiliate us.
We - are always putting off or procrastinating projects, undertakings and ideas, and finding many 'important' excuses for it. We are afraid that we are not good enough, that we will fail, that we will make fools out of ourselves, so better not to try at all.
We - maintain relationships with people who - if it weren't for our efforts - 'wouldn't know' where we live or that we also have a phone they could call us to hear how we're doing.
Should I name any further examples of the shade in which we are always hiding for undoubtfully good reasons?
How about taking advantage of the sunflower philosophy and setting your face towards the literal and proverbial sun?
AND SO FROM NOW ON, WE MIGHT AS WELL, FOR EXAMPLE:
give up waiting for the partner to change or trying to change them. Nobody will ever change just because we want it, so no point in wasting life for that. We can only change ourselves. We don't have to deserve love. We can have it completely free and without the slightest effort, being exactly the way we are - here and now.
We might as well think of a job that we would enjoy, even if initially for less money. The money is not just numbers on the account. It is the energy of enthusiasm that we put into work. By doing the job with joy, we will attract good, friendly people and, over time - better financial conditions, and eliminate both the 'Thank God it's Friday' syndrome and dreading each Monday subsequently.
We might as well use every free moment for reminding ourselves or thinking about what we like doing - and even if nothing comes to mind at first - look for it persistently and every day. Dreams are like muscles. We have to exercise them regularly. First, we should realize that we have them at all, and when we decide which ones we want to develop particularly, we need to start working out regularly.
We might as well decide to quit our addictive substance or activity. Join one of the thousands of Facebook support groups that connect people with a similar situation. They all struggle to fight the same weaknesses and precisely understand how it's like, so we wouldn't feel alone. Everybody in such groups supports one another with warmth and understanding, sharing their experience and often really good ideas. They won't let us fail unless we give up on ourselves.
We might as well realize that those who 'happen' or 'got lucky' to have a happy life don't have it by accident. They created it with their decisions and determination. Maybe it is worth starting to get knowledgeable about that each of us creates our lives, and try to find the rules on how it happens? Having learned these principles, we will be able to use them consciously, and instead of an unsatisfactory life, create the one we want. The internet alone is full of fantastic - both theoretical and practical information on this matter. As a programmer at creating computer programs, there are many experts who know how to program a good life. It is worth tracking them down and flooding them with questions about how to do it. For those who want - it can be the beginning of really significant changes.
We might as well show claws to those who abuse our courtesy. How about taking care of proper education and learning how to start shaping healthy self-esteem and assertiveness? Let's find those who have these qualities and ask for help in teaching us how to achieve them.
We might as well admit that we did something stupid in a relationship with a person dear to us. It has nothing to do with our value as a human being, though, and does not cross the relationship off by itself. It's just a behavior that can be modified to the one that supports rather than undermines a relationship. If we decide to stay in 'the trench,' tossing grenades of our resentments and grudges at the other party and blaming them for the pain we suffer from, we will neither feel any better nor be able to enjoy the presence of that valuable person in our lives.
We might as well encourage ourselves to make one step towards our idea, which we are continuously putting off. If the people out there don't like it - it's their loss. We are the ones that need to love what we do. There will always be someone who will criticize us. We can also learn from it how to distinguish the criticism provided by haters - and avoid it, from the constructive criticism - and use it willingly, as it helps us learn from our mistakes and evolve. Everyone, without exception, makes mistakes. Unless they do nothing - then they don't, but also then they don't achieve anything. Is this our choice? The world is abundant, so if we decide to let it know about the fruits of our work - we will find our dedicated group of fans over time.
We might as well revise our list of acquaintances and leave those that are mutual, i.e., two-sided. Let's give up the rest. If it turns out that no one is left after the revision - well, we'll gain more time for ourselves to focus on our life, self-development and dreams, and sooner or later, we will find our soul mates on this path. The world is plentiful, and we don't have to chase happiness. When we focus on ourselves, the happiness will chase us.
Whenever we feel that the 'dark side' pulls us down - let's remind ourselves of the sunflower philosophy and turn to our sun immediately. The light allows us to notice better the possibilities that we have at our fingertips, but we simply do not see them when we are in the shade.
Healing by Force of Nature